And jokes

Two terrorists walk into a bar.

The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."

The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"

Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."

We used to have Reagan, Jonny Cash, and Bob Hope. Now we have Biden, no cash, and no hope.

I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.

I’m not calling you a slut, I’m calling you a penny.

Two-faced, worthless, and in everyone’s pants!

Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff?

Neither did I until I found his Head and Shoulders in the glove compartment.

A white woman was caught on video using racial slurs and assaulting two black students. She was charged with "interpreting" a black police officer.

What is the difference between women and cars?

At least one of them retained their value after getting wrecked.

The other day I went to a museum. My friend and I went to the Holocaust section, and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him, "Why are you sad? It's just an ashtray."

A child, molester, and priest walk into a bar.

He orders a drink.

My son came to me depressed, so I pointed to the spare bedroom and said, "Hang in here, son."

I threw a lamp at a depressed kid and tried to brighten up his day.

If Asriel were Sans, would his theme be "Jokes and Memes"?

What does Micheal Jackson and a rock have in common?

They are both hard.

Like and comment if you play Fortnite!

What's the difference between an emo and a banana?

They both hang like apples.

Roses are red, Violets are fine, You can be the six, And I can be the nine.

A blind man was walking into a fish market. He took a deep breath and said, “Good morning, ladies!”

Why are there so many black men in the NBA that only want to play basketball on a all black basketball team? because they prefer to suck a long and thick big black dick

It's like your hairline and your forehead had a disagreement.

What does a depressed person and a chicken have in common? They both try to fly.