Air

Air Jokes

Spring

These two guys were texting each other.

Guy 1: How are you?

Guy 2: I’m great. The weather is lovely here. Guy 2: *sends picture of a flying spring*

Guy 1: ???

Guy 2: Springs in the air. :)

Orphan

Someone went up to an orphan and asked him why he was talking to the air. He said he was talking to his mom.

Emo

Did you know emos are the highest jumpers? Some of them are still in the air.

Sex

How is sex like air?

It’s not a big deal unless you aren’t getting any.

Terrorist

What did the terrorist do when New York didn’t want his food:

Here comes the airplane.

Hitler

There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”

Emo

What type of people have the world record for most stories read in the shortest amount of time?

Emos, some of them are still in the air.

Girlfriend

My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.

Asthma

My brother apparently has this thing called "asthma". Anyway, I took his vape away today, and he was lying on the floor gasping for air, lol. He must really be addicted to it.

Watermelon

Dude, if there is a watermelon, shouldn't there be an earthmelon, airmelon, and a firemelon? The elemelons.

Terrorist

A Russian, a Brit, and a terrorist are in an air balloon.

First, the Russian says, "I dare to throw a stone down!" So he does that, but the others don't seem to be impressed. So the Brit says, "I dare to throw a brick down!" So again he does that, the Russian is impressed, but the terrorist laughs and says, "I dare to throw a bomb down!" So he does that and everybody can't believe what they have just seen. So a bit further, they land, and a shocked and afraid little boy comes running up to them. So they ask what happened, on which the little boy said, "I farted and my school exploded."

Emo

You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.

Kid

Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"

Kid: "A leopard."

Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."

Kid: "Broooooooooooo."

Gun

I am armed with an automatic 4-OXD 22. caliber machine gun. HANDS IN THE AIR!

School

I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!

I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!