My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.
It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.
Abuse Jokes
What has 2 legs and loves to play with little kids? The local priest.
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
"I know that everyone is allowed to act stupid once in a while, but you’re really abusing that privilege."
A man is consoling his nine-year-old daughter after she had been sexually assaulted.
"You need to be more careful," he said as he wrapped his arm around her, "this time it was me, next time it could be a total stranger."
What’s the best part of raping an 11 year old girl?
Getting to kill the little bitch after you’ve finished with her.
What's a priest's favorite toy?
A mute little boy.
If you're having a bad day, just slap an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their parents?
Daddy, I really miss you. Mummy changed my name to Tickle Timpson. Anyway, daddy I forgive you for abusing me.
What do you call a virgin kid locked in a room with a pedophile? Past tense.
My uncle is an alchemist.
He can turn 3 bottles of beer into 4 hours of abuse.
Why should you abuse the hell out of an orphan? Because what are they gonna do? Tell their mom or dad?
The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.
"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"
So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"
"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."
What’s the difference between cancer and my abusive stepdad?
My stepdad did beat cancer.
Miksi Michael Jackson sopisi joulupukiksi?
Hän tyhjentää säkkinsä lapsiin.
Roses are red, violets are blue, If I slapped you, that’d be animal abuse.
I would give you a thrashing, but that would be animal abuse.
This joke is so that this reaches 69 jokes.
I'd tell a joke about how my mom was abusive, but I either forgot everything, or she just wasn't there.
A Catholic priest finds a young boy crying at the top of a cliff.
“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?”
The boy points down. “Mummy and Daddy were in the car and it went over the edge.”
The priest can see the flaming wreck below. He looks around and sees no one else is about and starts to unbutton his belt.
“It’s really not your day, is it?”
