PurplePanda

@purplepanda

Registered on · 19 followers · Last active 8 months ago

Tea

1 view ·

Jazzy, please explain everything that happened... I want the tea. Also, Jazzy, what happened to your phone number and Insta?

Toaster

11 views ·

And God said to John, "Come forth, and you shall be granted eternal life."

But John came fifth and won a toaster.

Dinner

5 views ·

Son: What's for dinner tonight?

Mom: Steak!

Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?

Mom: HUNGER!

Insult

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Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.

Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.

Kid 1: Aw, thanks!

Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10

Kid

Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?

Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!

Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?

Kid 2: No!

Book

I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.

Halloween

1 view ·

Hey guys, I have a question.

Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?

Kid

35 views ·

Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”

Kid: “Whatever!”

Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”

Kid: “Doesn't matter!”

Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”

Kid: “Oh well!”

Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”

Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”