mal

when i talk to you cupid walks right through and shoots an arrow through my heart ----laufey---- if i were a chicken, id cross the road and get hit by a car. https://www.quotev.com/story/17091242/The-Cassette-Tape/1 i love my sweet handsome boy more than anything โค๏ธ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ’›๐ŸŒป๐ŸŒผ๐ŸŒป๐Ÿ’›
Registered on ยท 79 followers ยท Last active 2 hours ago

Why does Batmanโ€™s mask only cover half of his face?

So the police can see that heโ€™s white.

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

Oneโ€™s a Good Year, the otherโ€™s a great year.

What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?

Little boys turn them on.

What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.

Whatโ€™s a reverse exorcism?

Itโ€™s when the demon tells the priest to get out of the child.

There were four men eating dinner on the Titanic when it hit the iceberg.

The waiter said, "We have to get to the lifeboats!"

The teacher said, "What about the kids?"

The lawyer said, "Fuck the kids."

The priest said, "Do you think we'll have time?"

What's the difference between hungry and horny?

Where you stick the cucumber.

What do you call a group of black people in a shed?

Antique farm equipment.

My husband told me he just came into a lot of money.

Weird, he usually uses a sock.

Whatโ€™s the difference between a man and a margarita?

A margarita hits the spot every time.

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

What concert only costs 45 cents?

50 Cent featuring Nickelback.