If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d still only have five cents.
Worst Jokes Ever
If you were a fruit, you’d be a ‘fine-apple.’
You’re like a fine wine. The more of you I drink in, the better I feel.
Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got "fine" written all over you.
What is red and goes 200 miles per hour?
A baby in a blender.
My brother likes his Vegemite so black, it stole our car.
Google is butt.
What do you call a dwarf?
Adrian!
Yo mama so fat, everytime she has to use the world's largest knife.
Wanna hear a joke? Your dad leaving you, you sad clown!
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have no one to call daddy.
Every Dorito bag for orphans is family sized.
Teacher, there are 3 birds. 1 gets shot. How many are left?
Student, none. They flew off because the shot scared them off.
Teacher, actually 2, but I like the way you think.
5 minutes later
Student, there are 3 women eating ice cream. 1 is licking it, 1 is drinking it melted, and 1 is sucking it. Which one is married?
Teacher, the one sucking it?
Student, no, the one with the ring, but I like the way you think.
Yo mama's so fat, she invented double doors!
Yo momma's so stupid, she starved to death in a grocery store.
Why do Japanese people hate iPhones? Because they're scared that American airdrops will fall on them.
"Akeld" sounds like a 56-year-old man just picking on kids for no reason. I say, get a life!
My dad still hasn’t come back with the milk. Now we are stuck eating dry cereal.
Did you know curing boredom is quite simple?
For instance, you could pretend to be an apple by tying a rope around your neck for a stem.
Kobe missed a lot of shots, but he sure didn’t miss the mountain.
