80 jokes
In order to get $355 million for his civil fraud case, Donald Trump desperately needed to fundraise. So, in every Republican Party event, he will serve the Patriotic Trump Dog! It consists of an 80-year-old sausage inside a 10-year-old cream bun, topped with Russian dressing.
Trump does have the best people, doesn't he?
When you're going 80 mph and hit a speed bump,
Then the speed bump starts screaming.
Did you know the people in the twin towers were great readers?
Yeah, they went through 80 stories in seconds.
My wife wanted a present that could go from zero to 80 very quickly.
So I got her a new set of bathroom scales.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims. They went through 80 stories in 7 seconds. In case you didn't see that one coming, don't feel bad, they didn't either.
What is 80 feet wide and has 22 teeth?
Answer: The front row of a Trump Rally!
Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: Twin Tower victims, they got 80 stories in ten seconds.
When you're going 80 km in a school zone and one of the speed bumps screams.
The real dead hooker joke is on all of us from the Fraser Valley in BC. You know damn well each and everyone of us ate that Pickton hooker pork. Considering it stretching from the 80's-2000's, pretty sure he got 4 generations of Valley folk with that Pickton pork.
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
I don't know what an HD is, but my doctor says I have 80 of 'em'.
Who are the fastest readers?
9/11 victims because they went through 80 stories in 10 seconds. 😂
What does an 80-year-old woman taste like?
Depends.
What's the last thing to go through a fly's head as it hits the windshield of a car going 80 mph? Its butt.
Surveys show that 80% of women who wear yoga pants never do yoga.
And 100% of men don’t care.
Beneath this monumental stone Lise, 80 pounds of skin and bone.
What does an orphan have in common with an 80-year-old woman? Their parents will never come back.
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stockpiled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.
What did the pirate say when he turned 80?
"Aye, matey."
What world record did the people in 9/11 get?
The world record for going down 80 floors in a matter of seconds.