Yours jokes

A child with cancer: "I want to be like you when I grow up." Doctor: "Oh, you're not going to grow up."

Your hairline is like the universe, still waiting to be discovered.

I saw this kid on the street wearing a rag. I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."

"OK, son," he says. "It's as easy as counting to 5."

1. Pull down your pants. 2. Pull back your foreskin. 3. Pee in the toilet. 4. Put your foreskin back. 5. Pull up your pants.

From then on, every time the boy goes to the toilet, he counts from 1 to 5. One day, the father noticed his son was taking quite some time in the toilet. He went to check on him and overheard his son saying, "2,4,2,4,2,4,2,4."

What is the difference between a priest and a zit?

The zit waits until you're twelve to come on your face.

Your hairline is more bent than your gender.

When the people that see you cry, that doesn't mean they miss you. That mean they scared of your onion breath! 🐑💨

Just letting you know if people cry when they see you, that doesn't mean they miss you. That means they're scared of your onion breath.

What goes oOoOo on your breath that scared away the animals from the farm?

Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."

I'd tell you a 9/11 joke, but it'd fly over your head and into the Twin Towers.

Your hairline is so far back it took a trip to America.

Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:

Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.

Her: Really? What?

Me: Sweet-in-low.

Her: Why?

Me: Because you're artificial.

It looks like Will Smith slapped your hairline so hard that the dinosaurs can see it now.

Your head was mistaken for a chicken wing.

You're so weak, someone breathed on you and you flew away!

You're so ugly that if you looked in the mirror, you would walk into the light.

Your skin's so bright you could be used as a highlighter.

I thought you were just raising your eyebrow, but I checked the x-ray, and your skull shifted 128 degrees to the right.

If every time someone faints when they see your face and I get 1 cent, I would be a trillionaire.