Wrong jokes

My dad went to go get milk. He came back 7 years later, and we had to send him back because he got the wrong milk.

Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me. I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" on her forehead.

Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.

So much to do, so much to see So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.

[Chorus:] Hey, now, you're an All Star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid. And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder. You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older. But the meteor men beg to differ Judging by the hole in the satellite picture.

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin. The water's getting warm so you might as well swim. My world's on fire. How about yours? That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored.

[Chorus 2x]

Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas. I need to get myself away from this place. I said yep, what a concept I could use a little fuel myself And we could all use a little change.

Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.

So much to do, so much to see. So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.

[Chorus]

And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.

A lady walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs. The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea." The lady replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."

A man hit a woman with his car, who is wrong?

The man, because you can’t drive into the kitchen.

Suicide isn't a joke. It's called "parkour gone wrong."

Pick a number, syckkkkkkk, that’s the wrong number.

What did the depressed kid do in P.E.? They played with the jump rope, but they used it the wrong way.

I just saw people writing "Zoophile," "Ailurophile," and "Dendrophilia" in their bios. I thought this was cool, but when I wrote "Necrophile" and "Pedophile," I don't know why people started hating me as if I did something wrong. I was just trying to be cool like them, man.

Why can't two Asians make a white kid?

Two wrongs don't make a white.

when is rape wrong on so many levels?

inside a lift.

The daughter of an incestuous pedophile goes into the living room where he is watching TV and asks him if she can borrow the car that evening.

"Sure honey! If you suck my dick!"

So she gets down on him but something is wrong. She pops her head up and says: "Dad! This tastes like shit!"

"Oh yeah, I forgot," says the father. "I already gave your brother the car for tonight."

What fits neatly into a hole, slides nicely between breasts, and if used wrong could choke someone? A seatbelt.

Top tip; if your wife asks, "What would you like to do to my body?" 'Identify it' is the wrong answer.

What's wrong with airline food...! They're not black, and they're not people. hahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahahXD!!!!!!!!! You're welcome?

Doctor: You need new glasses.

Patient: How'd you know? I haven't even told you what is wrong with me yet.

Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window.

What do you call an arrow pointing the wrong way?

A Disap point ment.

Why don’t Asians use phones?

Cuz they wing da wrong number!!!

109 countries can't be wrong. Watch Europa: The Last Battle.

I walked into an orphanage and a kid was crying. I asked him what was wrong and he said some kids were bullying him. I told him to go tell his parents.

I am never wrong. One time I thought I was wrong, but I was mistaken.