How much of a homophobic heterosexual man are you? I'm so homophobic I won't suck a big dick that has ketchup on it
Covid-19 won't last long... it's made in China
Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons. American: I won't ever see my dog again! Italian: I won't ever make pizzas again! German: Hey, granddad, how have you been?
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.
What is the difference between giving money to a church and giving money to the IRS? If you stop giving money to a church you won't go to prison
From your Dad I won’t be back for a while, it’s a very long line
kid with hallucinations and cancer on jeopardy game show
what's behind curtain #1... YOU HAVE WON..... CANCER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah) Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh I'm sad and low, yeah I'm sad and low, yeah Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah) Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh I'm sad and low, yeah I'm sad and low, yeah I gave her everything She took my heart and left me lonely I've been broken, heart's contentious I won't fix, I'd rather weep I'm lost and I'm found, but It's torture being in love I love when you're around But I fucking hate when you leave Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah) Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh I'm sad and low, yeah I'm sad and low, yeah Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah) Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh I'm sad and low, yeah I'm sad and low, yeah Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah) Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh I'm sad and low, yeah I'm sad and low, yeah Who am I? Someone that's afraid to let go, uh You decide, if you're ever gonna, let me know (yeah) Suicide, if you ever try to let go, uh I'm sad and low, yeah I'm sad and low, yeah
Bully...you such an asshole. Me... Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger
1.Your face is so ugly i thought it was deformed it probably was anyways 2.even if donald trump had time to build a wall it was probably so you won't squish us with you fatass. if someone says your face is deformed just say thats what happens when i look at you. welcome
The Coach of the Detroit Lions had put together the perfect football team. But then his quarterback got blindsided and was out for the season with a knee injury.
Then his backup went down with a concussion. He tried the trading route, free agents, but nobody any good was available.
One evening while watching the news from Iraq, he saw a young Iraqi soldier with an amazing arm. The soldier rifled a grenade on a perfect arc into a 4th story window from 100 yards, bam!
He tossed another directly into a tight group of 12 enemy fighters 80 yards away, ka-bam! Then a humvee passed, going 60 kph, boom! Another perfect shot!
Coach said to himself, "I got to have this guy. He's got the best arm I've ever seen!"
He tracks him down and convinces him to come to Detroit. The kid takes coaching perfectly, makes all the plays, and long story short, the Lions win the Super Bowl.
The Iraqi is now the Conquering Hero in pro football, and a huge story. But when the broadcast team tries to interview him, all he wants is to phone his mom.
"Mother," he yells over the phone, "We just won the Super Bowl!"
"Don't talk to me," the woman says. "You abandoned us. You can't be my son."
The young Iraqi begs, "Mom, you don't understand! Our team won the biggest game here in the U.S. Thousands of fans are screaming for me. The U.S. President is going to call me!"
"I don't care," his mother snaps. "Right now I can hear gunshots everywhere. Our block is like a ruin. Your brothers were beaten half to death last night, and your sister was nearly raped."
Then she says, "I can never forgive you for making us move to Detroit.
What's the difference between broccoli and a booger?
Kids won't eat broccoli
If you don't stop the pun, soon it won't be so fun.
Most states:
"It's ok, it won't be awkward. We're still friends."
Alabama:
"She didn't wanna be my girlfriend anymore. But she said she'll still be my sister."
what do you call a dog without legs? nothing it won't come either way.
my sister is so annoying she won 10000$to go to hel
Americans won't have a Thanksgiving Dinner this year. Why not? They sent their turkey to the White House.
Dad: "I'm giving all your toys to the orphanage."
Kid: "Why are you doing that?"
Dad: "So you won't get bored there."
A child has diarrhea and asked his mom for a viagra. "Why in the world do you want that?" She asked him. He looks at her and says, "Well that's what you gift dad when his shit won't get hard."
The two biggest Dyslexic guy lies: "My check is in your mouth" and "I won't cum in your mailbox"
