Winston jokes

What do you call a blind and illiterate military leader?

Winston Churchill.

Yo mama is so evil that Dallas Winston fell in love with her.

What cigarettes does Churchill's wife like to smoke?

Blue Winston.

Sometimes I just wake up in the morning and think, "Damn, better luck next time!"

Wahoo!

Good luck, Gwen, with everything!

Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."

Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."

I'm the second worst thing to happen to those orphans.