"Rehab's for quitters, and I don't give up."
Chuck Norris and Time had a race.
Result: Time is still running...
What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?
They both came in a little behind.
I was playing Mortal Kombat with my friend when he picked the fighter Pristiano Penaldo. I won and the voice didn't say "Finish him," so I couldn't do a fatality.
I was confused, but I understood that the game didn't let me finish him because he is already finished.
Why did the legless kid think he won a race?
Because everybody already left.
A hot dog and a banana had a race. Who won?
The wiener.
Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.
Playing Russian roulette alone means you're bound to be a winner eventually.
Stephen Hawking always wins musical chairs, as he’s always sitting down.
What do an Olympic silver medalist and a Catholic priest have in common?
A: They both come in a little behind.
Gaston gets the no-Belle prize! :D
Name the emojis, and if you do, then you get 900/900 points for knowing all the emojis! Type in the comment section.
1. 😀 What's this emoji meaning? 2. 😃 What's this emoji meaning? 3. 😚 What's this emoji meaning? 4. 😁 What's this emoji meaning? 5. 😍 What's this emoji meaning? 6. 😋 What's this emoji meaning? 7. 🧐 What's this emoji meaning? 8. 😟 What's this emoji meaning? 9. 😳 What's this emoji meaning? 10. 😟 What's this emoji meaning? 11. 😰😨 What's this emoji meaning? 12. 😏 What's this emoji meaning? 13. 😬 What's this emoji meaning? 14. 🤐😣 What's this emoji meaning? 15. 😦🥺 What's this emoji meaning?
The winner who will win will be getting 900/900 points!
Why can’t orphans play poker?
Because they don’t know what a full house is! 🥵🥵👴😂🔫😈💀💀💀💀💀💀
GIVEAWAAAAAAY!!!
Okay, 19 dollar Fortnite card. Who wants it? And yes, I’m giving it away. Remember: Share, share, share! And trolls: Don’t get BLOCKED!
And the winner of the Tour de France is awarded, as ever, with the yellow jersey.
To remind him what color his piss is meant to be.
Did you know about the guy who invented knock knock jokes?
He won the no-Bell prize.
I went home one day and see a few married guys in line in my sister's room. I ask what's going on, my sister is running a contest. The contest is the married guys lick her pussy and guess what she had for breakfast. The winner gets a free blowjob. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder that she thought that she made up that contest.
Why did the African win the food eating contest?
Beginner's luck.
Being incest isn't that bad. I was fingering my sister, and I found my dad's old wedding ring. Winner winner!
I entered ten puns in a joke contest to see which one would win.
No pun in ten did.
