Why jokes
I thought I told you to lock up when I left this morning. This is why our shit gets stolen all the time!
Literally no one: Why can't you hear the pterodactyl?
Random person: I don't know.
No one: BECAUSE THEY ARE EXTINCT!
Random person: Ha, cool, I guess.
Why do women have periods?
Because they deserve them, haha!
So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.
And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphan’s least favorite song? "We are Family."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? "Family Guy."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? "Meet the Parents."
What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.
Next: Inappropriate Jokes
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman... no other reasons besides that.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
To fuck the chicken.
Why do we name hurricanes?
To keep an eye on them.
You were born on the freeway, you know why?
Because that's where a lot of accidents happen. 😈
"The only way I'd want to be reincarnated is if I can be reincarnated as a man," said the young woman.
"Why?" said her friend.
"Oh, I don't know, just men are so cool,"
"Is that the only reason?" said her friend.
"Maybe........" said the young woman. "Maybe."
Why don't bulls play archery? They might hit a bulls-eye.
Why did Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Oh wait, he didn't.
I just went to India and thought, "Why do they have so many sniper hitmen?" It turns out the red dot isn't a sniper laser.
Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.
You text someone to ask them why they snobbed you. Then they snob you again.
Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?
So they can climb a fence easier.
Why is America so bad at Clash of Clans? Because we already lost two towers.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
Why don't molestation victims speak up about their trauma? Because it's a touchy topic.
Why can't Asians do word searches?
They can't see the words.