Whos jokes
My friend group is pretty diverse. I'm Japanese, one friend is Filipino, one is American, one is Italian, and the last one is German.
Out of everyone in the friend group, the Filipino and the American were the quickest to feel uncomfortable when I asked, "Who wants to go on a march with me?"
Who are the fastest readers?
9/11 victims.
What do you call a horny emo who practices self-control?
An edgelord.
Me: Knock knock.
Orphan: Who's there?
Me: Not your family.
One day, a priest loses his cock (chicken). He goes to the church and says, "Who has seen a cock?" All the women raised their hands. "No, who has seen a cock that is not theirs?" Half the women's hands went up. "No, no, no, who has seen my cock?" All the nuns' hands went up.
What do you call a girl above age 16 who says she is a virgin? A liar.
Who's the world's fastest readers?
9/11 victims.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Yo mum." "Yo mum who?" "Yo mum is watching you wank right now."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I did.
I did who?
You did a poo.
Who needs April Fool's when your life is a joke?
The police: Pull over!
The kid: Do you know who my dad is?
The police: What, your mom did not tell you?
If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language?
An American.
To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad.
When someone got the ghost in them, sound in the Priest Busters.
When something strange and it ain't no who you gonna call? Priest Busters.
Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.
My friend who is in a wheelchair told me a joke, and I burst out laughing. I told him he should be a stand-up comedian.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lemon.
Haha! Hahahah! Hahahaah!
One day there was a frantic call at the fire department:
"Help me, help me! There is a cat meowing nearby. It is going to hurt me, it's going to kill me, can you help me, and send the fire squad right away?"
"Take it easy, cats don’t hurt us, just relax and wait until he leaves."
"You don’t understand it is going to bite me, it is going to kill me, it is going to be fatal!"
"Cats aren’t venomous or in any other way dangerous, now who is calling?"
"I’m Indy's parrot you twit! Now help me! Please help, please help!"
Who is the king of the insects 🐜?
The Monarch!