When jokes
What time is it when you get home? Can you walk me home, and then get home? Then I can walk you home, and walk home.
What time is it when you say "bad day?"
What time is it when you walk out to the school?
Time to go to school!
What time is it when you say I can’t walk anymore? Time to get a wheelchair 🦼.
What time is it when you cannot walk? Time to get a wheelchair 🦽.
What time is it when you get mad 😡 at school? Time to calm down.
Man and woman are having a discussion. The woman looks into the man's eyes and says, "Honey, you know how I like it when you walk up and stick it in . . . "
". . . but I love it when Bob walks up and sticks it in!"
Divorce is scheduled for next month.
It's embarrassing when there is no toilet paper and you need to go and get one with your pants down. Luckily, the supermarket is just around the corner.
What time is it when you say no to everything? Time to get bored.
What happens when a sink on the Titanic overflows?
It sinks it.
What time is it when you get a chance to take a car and drive all over?
Time to get in trouble!
What time is it when you can smell smoke inside?
Time to get outside!
What time is it when you say, "Wake up?"
It is morning.
Nobody:
The Vietcong when America lands on their beaches:
tReE pOwErS aCtIvAtE!
When did “yo” mean Hello?
They are so different, how did they come to mean the same thing? Did someone just walk up and accidentally say “llo” instead of hello and people were just like “what did you say?” and the man being embarrassed just made up a story and say “oh, I said yo, which means hello in my original language."
Spanish is difficult. When my mom gives me food, she says "toma," and that's drink in English, so I always drink my food.
"When Republicans do politics, it's a crime. But when Democrats commit crimes, it's politics." ---Tyler Nixon
What time is it when you say "what?"
Time to start over!
Why do people say "cheese" when they are taking a photo?
Because they were using the computer and thought about it.
What time is it when dogs get hurt?
Time to take your dog to the vet!