What did one dog say to another dog? I love you.
Whats Jokes
What did one snow ❄️ man say to itself? My arm is broken.
What has two legs but can’t walk? Pants 👖
Q: What kind of Christmas music do elves like?
A: “Wrap” music.
What are cow jokes considered?
Cheesy.
What do you call a cow with no toes?
Lac-toes intolerant.
What do you call a cow that doesn't stop shaking?
A milkshake.
What's the best way to cure the hiccups? Suicide.
What animal do you always find at a baseball game? A bat.
What happens if you mix the two names "Shannon" and "Stephanie"? You have the name "Shanny."
What do chickens play in the pool? Marco Polo.
What falls and never gets hurt? Snow.
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Cashew.
What did the processor say when it was being overclocked?
"Stop it! It hertz so much!"
What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.
A guy was on trial for murder, and if convicted, would get the electric chair. His brother found out that a redneck was on the jury and figured he would be the one to bribe. He told the redneck that he would be paid $10,000 if he could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to manslaughter.
The jury was out an entire week and returned with a verdict of manslaughter.
After the trial, the brother went to the redneck's house, told him what a great job he had done, and paid him the $10,000.
The redneck replied that it wasn't easy to convince the rest of the jury to change the charge to manslaughter. They all thought he was not guilty and wanted to let him go.
Sans: haha... Paps: what? Sans: i KNEW it was gonna rain today. Paps: that's nearly impossible, how? Sans: i could feel it in my bo- Paps: OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A man was sitting in the restaurant and ordered a whole buffet. He is visited by an oracle. Apollo says, "If you eat that buffet, everyone you love will die."
"Up yours," the man said, "What are they going to die of, famine?"
Moments later, there was an incident that took place in the restaurant. Everyone literally died. It turned out the restaurant had a B-. I said, "Is that really a thing groaning on the hospital?"
The doctor said, "Know that is your condition, you have hepatitis B-."
"What the FU***** SH**"
Apollo is sitting in Mount Olympus, dying also in laughter.
I may not be that good with puns on this site, but I got a skele-ton of jokes. Hey, what's the matter pal, is there something crawling under your skin?
What do you call a nosy pepper?
Jalapeno.
