Undead jokes
The walking dead.
What is a necrophile's least favorite game?
The Walking Dead.
Why didn't the skeleton want to make art anymore?
He didn't have the heart to put into it.
Q: How can you tell if a vampire is sick?
A: By how much he's coffin.
Why did the skeleton want a friend? He was feeling bonely.
What hood do zombies come from?
Dead Ends.
Q: What do you call a zombie with no mouth?
A: Useless.
How do you know a vampire's sick? If he's coffin (coughing?)
I am going to be a ghost for Halloween. I actually want to be a ghost every day, because at least I'd be dead.
What is a little zombie's favorite stuffed animal?
It's a deady bear.
I asked my zombie boyfriend, "Does he have a brain?" Because he's stupid asf.
Why do prostitutes love servicing zombies? They always leave a tip.
What did a skeleton say when he's alone?
"I'm so bonely..."
If there was a zombie, you would not die because you have no brain.
What do vegetarian zombies eat?
Graaaaiins.
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
Why are vampires always sick?
Because they are coffin.
I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak, and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.
Why did the skeleton die from laughter?
'Cause they broke all his "funny bones!"
What do you call a zombie?
Nothing because zombies aren’t real, and if they were, you would be dead.