I tell dad jokes all the time even though I’m not actually a dad
I’m a faux pa.
i went to see my dentist and she warned me it was going to hurt. then she told me she was having an affair with my husband. good news though...the cleaning didnt hurt.
I wrote an essay today about africa and I FAILED even though i wrote a perfect rendition of the hunger games storyline
My short friend called me a scrub, even though he was the one below me.
so a man was on a ledge ready to kill himself because he got laid off at work and his girlfriend cheated on him he was about to jump until he saw from a mountain side a little guy with no arms dancing around so he thought maybe my life aint so bad so he went to the mountain side thank you he said i was gonna jump off a bridge and kill myself until i saw you dancing even though youu have no arms dancing? the armless man said bitterly my asshole itches and i cant scratch it
My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!” They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
I've been told I've got a perfect cock. She sure was hard on me when I took it from her though.
my friend josh made a joke about liams hairline even though his ears are so big and his face looks like a monkey......if they were white
looking out for becoming a pilot, can y'all suggest some good mosques?
don't want to learn the landing part though, allah said it's unnecessary.
Love that dress, it would look much better on my floor though.
I burnt down an orphanage and then showed an orphan the orphanage that I burned down and he loved it. Not really though.
Hi! Sorry I haven't posted in a while. Ive been so busy!!!! I miss yall though!
So my depressed friend wanted to high-five the tree by the cemetery
The tree left him hanging though
5 4 3 2 1. I love the huge bright sun. 5 4 3 2 1. My life has just begun. Though Akeld and Unkown, make me feel alone, they want be dead, and off with my head, and all I said was... NO FRICKIN' HATIN' IN THESE COMMENTS! WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called - sheesh
I made a website about orphans. It didn’t have a homepage though.
Confucius say, man who go though turn table is going to bangkok
I Love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball though.
A new burger has been invented in memory of Stephen Hawking.
I doubt it will sell though, as it's 95% cabbage.
