The jokes
Did you hear about the cat jail break out? It was a cat-tastrophe.
Little Sally comes home from school one day and says to her mom, "Mommy, mommy, you won’t believe it! Little Johnny just pulled out his PP in class." The mother responded, "Well, what did it look like?" Sally said, "It looks like a peanut." The mother said, "Oh, it was small." "No, it was salty," said Sally.
There once was a man named Dave who dug up a prostitutes grave, she was as moldy as shit and missing a tit, but think of all the money he saved
Roses are red, the Jews are a cult.
I've practiced Metzitzah b'peh on adults.
What was Hitler's favorite thing to do to pass the time?
Smoking.
Did you hear about the baby with cancer? It never gets old.
What’s missing from an orphan's iPad?
The home button.
Have you ever thought about the fact that every market in Africa is a black market?
What has two wings and an arrow?
The Chinese telephone, wing wing, arrow.
What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
With the sentence "Die in Hölle," you can buy shoes in Germany.
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them, "Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.
What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.
Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.
Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?
Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
Why couldn't the orphan get an Android? Because it didn't have a home button.
When the North Tower saw the South Tower collapse, he would say, "I'm still standing."
When the school shooter says to get on the ground, but the sped kid thinks it's Simon Says!