The jokes
Why did the ocean wave?
It wanted to say "Hi Tide."
What kinda pizza did the Twin Towers order?
Two plains.
You call it turds.
I call it the forbidden chocolate.
What's the difference between an apple and an emo kid?
One falls, while the other hangs.
Yo mama so dumb that when she saw the "log in" page on her computer, she went and put a log in it.
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
Q: What’s the difference between apples and orphans?
A: Apples get picked.
The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
Yo mama so fat when I pushed her into the jacuzzi, it caused a level 8 tsunami.
Go to an orphanage and tell the kids their parents came back as an April Fools' joke.
Why does the orphan like nature? He can call someone "mother."
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They told her to go find the light.
"No Way Home" is just the life of an orphan.
What's the difference between blood and an orphan? Blood has a place in all of our hearts.
In America, you work on a plantation.
In Soviet Russia, the plantation works on you!
Went swimming today and peed in the deep end. The lifeguard saw me and blew his whistle so loud I almost fell in.
I beat up a deaf kid the other day. I had to. He kept throwing up gang signs.
What were the candles doing at a birthday party?
Getting lit.
Pass me the sugar, Sugar!
Pass me the honey, Honey!
Pass me the teabag!