The jokes

Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"

Did you hear about the orphan that tried to high five a tree? It left her hanging.

What do the initials POOP stand for?

Polacks Order Our Poop. 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩 💩

If a lion ate a child, is the lion a child predator?

▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.

Spread the cat gun.

I stole a wheelchair. I knew the owner would come crawling back.

The kid in the wheelchair was getting bullied, so I encouraged him to stand up for himself. I don't know why he started crying.

Wanna know who can jump the highest? Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.

An Asian student was learning logarithm in class. He wrote down his name after the question. The teacher asked why. He replied, "My class ID is number 1."

Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).

Azibo works 10 hours a day in the sun and is paid 1 euro an hour. Thanks to a fundraiser we will be able to raise the necessary funds to buy a whip to make him work twice as much.

Your hairline's so far back even Bill Nye the Science Guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.

I'm looking for the bartender.

Person named Bart:

I heard that the World Orphan Organization has a sponsor... DC Comics.

I would make a joke about Silver the Hedgehog... but it's no use!

Q: Why did the student eat his homework?

A: Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!

Yo mom's so fat that she wakes up on both sides of the bed.

What’s the difference between McDonald’s and 9/11?

One is a drive through; the other is a fly through.

My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:

I got it from her when I was born.

So my depressed friend wanted to high-five the tree by the cemetery.

The tree left him hanging though.