The jokes

Foot

Why are women’s feet so small?

So they can stand closer to the sink.

Slinky

What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?

They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.

Orphan

What's the difference between an orphan and Spider-Man?

There's no way home.

People

Pickup line for gay people:

Roses are red, Antarctica is in the south, Get on your knees, And open your mouth.

Memes

Leaf

Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?

Ben: I don't know.

Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.

Lipstick

Once my girlfriend asked me to give her lipstick, and I accidentally gave her the glue stick.

She won't talk to me anymore.

Orphan

Wanna know something the orphan could never do?

Wish anyone a happy Mother’s Day or Father’s Day.

Phone

The fact that I am high won't stop me from advising you.

Don't plug your phone while charging it; it is very dangerous.

Rape

The amount of women judging me for raping a poor lady is terrible. You weren't there. You don't know!

Father

Are you sure your father isn't a thief?

Because he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.

Orphan

What’s the difference between an orphan and a baseball field? The baseball field has a home to run back to.

Computer

A computer is like a living organism. Its charger is its life support. If you "pull the plug," you are letting it slowly die.

Orphan

What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?

They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.

Orphan

Why was the orphan so successful?

Because his options were to go bigger or go home. He only had one choice. :)