The jokes

Why did I giggle?

Because I saw the ocean's bottom.

Where do spiders commit crimes?

The Dark Web.

What's the difference between a nuclear reactor and your step sis? You need to use protection for the nuclear reactor.

If a man travels 14 miles to buy a loaf of bread, how long will it take for him to realise that living in the countryside is shit?

What kind of animal falls from the sky?

Answer: A raindeer.

Let's take a look at the Swedish bench for today's game. $12.99 from Ikea.

Thanks to an unfortunate typo, it's the most one-sided action movie ever.

Alen vs. Predator.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the turkey cross the road twice?

To prove he wasn't chicken!

Why did the chicken crack the safe?

To get to her nest egg.

A man tells his doctor, "Doc, help me. I’m addicted to Twitter!"

The doctor replies, "Sorry, I don’t follow you..."

Did you hear the gossip about butter? Never mind, I butter not spread it...

Why should you not let an orphan play baseball?

They don’t know where home is. 😢

Where does the killer whale go to get its teeth done?

The orca Don-tist.

I'm lookin' for some good jokes for the best song award. Can y'all help a fellow out?

Why is basketball such a messy sport?

'Cause the players are always dribbling everywhere!

Why did the cowboy put his bunk in the fireplace?

'Cause he wanted to sleep like a log!

Why did the gorilla leave the mafia headquarters for good?

Why does a woodpecker have a beak?

So as to not smash his head against the tree.

It is reported that when Churchill met Stalin at Yalta, they discussed their hobbies.

Churchill said: "I collect the jokes people tell me about me."

"That's a coincidence," said Stalin, "I collect the people who tell jokes about me."