The jokes
I heard that to slow the growth of fire, you use a flame retardant.
So I threw my stupid son in the flames when my house caught on fire!
Yo hairline was used as the blueprint for the Great Wall of China.
Why did the orphan become a criminal? It wants to be wanted.
Why did little Susie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms or legs.
Knock knock.
"Who's there?"
Not Susie.
Why did the depressed kid cross the road?
To get hit by a car.
Memes
Why couldn't the orphan buy chips?
They were all family sized.
I just thought of the best invention ever: a vape dildo.
Someone: "I WANNA BE THE SUN OF YOUR LIFE!"
Me: Then stay at 1,000,000 km of me.
how do you cut of a hillbilly's dick?
kick his sister in the jaw
My grandpa unplugged the AC, so I unplugged his life support.
What did the dick say to the condom?
Cover me, I'm going in. 😚😏
What do a school shooter and a lightbulb have in common? They both light up the classroom. 🤡💀
Me: *gets down on one knee*
Girlfriend: OMG, it's finally happening!
Me: *falls over*
Girlfriend: The poison is kicking in.
Yo mama so fat, she plays ping pong with the planets.
Say "invented" without the first "n".
I was in Russia listening to a stand-up comedian making fun of Putin.
The jokes weren't that good, but I liked the execution.
Why is the Leaning Tower of Pisa leaning? Because it had better reflexes than the Twin Towers.
I pushed the kid in a wheelchair into fire... I called him "HOT WHEELS".
A man sees a small boy begging for money. He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks, "What gave me away?"
The man responds, "Your parents."
Kid: "Mom, I had a scary dream. Can I come sleep with you and dad?"
Mom: "Sure, sweetie, sleep in the middle."
Kid: "Dad, can you get the remote out of my back?"
Dad: "That isn't the remote."
*Weird background music*