The jokes
Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"
What the can say to the tomato?
Tomato tomato potato potato find twelve recipe for the both 👍🏾
I put on ingredient sticker read for tasting good.
What say the child to the man? Shalom.
Man come later give the child: "Here, what you asked for!"
Child: "No, sir! I say Shabbat Shalom. I not ask for salmon!"
Man: "It may be the coin in me ear, hard to hear."
Why don’t rappers ever get lost?
They always have a NAVIGATOR dropping the beat.
My friend's dad died during 9/11. He was such a good pilot, but my friend kept disturbing him, so when his dad died, he said, "It was you who killed me" (to the child).
So the child said, "Yoo-hoo? What type of name is Yoo-hoo, but Yoo-hoo, Yoo-hoo come here, I need to kill you NOW."
Memes
POV: An Asian kidnapper kidnapped an Asian kid, and the kidnapper called the kid's mom. Then the mom said, "No, it's fine, my kid got a B, he failed." And the kidnapper let him go saying he doesn't need a failure.
What do you call a rapper who works in the bakery?
DOUGH-KNIGHT
Why was the booty so good at poker?
Because it always had a good PAIR.
Why did the booty break up with the fart?
It was just too much GASLIGHTING.
Why is 10 scared of 11 and 9? Because he's in the middle of 9/11.
ISIS is the mark of the beast.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To get his degree in FLOW-NOMICS.
Why did the rapper get lost in the music?
Because he couldn't find the beat.
Why was the rapper always calm?
Because he had FLOW-ZEN.
Why did the rapper become an electrician?
Because he wanted to SHOCK the audience with his RHYMES.
Why did the rapper bring a suitcase to the studio?
Because he was packing his rhyme books!
What did the parrot say when it saw a duck?
"Polly want a quacker!"
Worst joke ever.
Yesterday, I saw an advert with a random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful.
And then I said, "Except the fat people." And then I got sent to my room for saying that.
Well, the "HOLE" story is, I shoved it up her hole.
What did the Olympic Swimmer call his son?
Paul.