The jokes
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
Yo mama is so fat that she's bigger than the cinematic Marvel Universe.
How many Emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
Why did the cats go in the litterbox?? To take a poop!
Why can’t an emo have sex?
They can’t make it to the bed, they kept swinging on the tree.
Mom: Son, where are my condoms?
Son: What are condoms?
Dad: She puts it on me and the sandwich.
Son: Wait, why did my girlfriend come over and take one?
Dad: Um, I don't know, but go to bed.
Son: But it's 2:46pm in the afternoon, bruh.
What is the most common theme in Africa?
Starvation.
A Catholic school is burning down. One of the priests says, "Save the children, save them!" Another priest says, "F*ck the children, we're gonna die!!" The last priest is like, "Hmmm... do we have time?"
People in 1912: The Titanic is unsinkable!
Iceberg: Hold my beer.
Having sex in the woods and a deer walks up and fucks you from the back.
What part of a vegetable can’t you eat?
The wheelchair. 😑
My friend: You're so skinny, you never miss the elevator when it's closing. You just slip right through!😂
Me thinking it's a gift from God: 🕴️😎
Your Mom so fat that she went on to commit suicide, but the roof fell off.....
Your hairline is so bad that the Teen Titans gave up.
What does Cinderella wear to the beach?
Glass slippers.
Roses are red, violets are blue, the stonks are high, and so are you.
What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...
They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.
Plane crash in China... pilots names released in the incident are as follows:
Sum Ting Wong.
Wei Toh Low.
Ho Lee Fuk.
Ban Din Ouch.
What is the difference between Jesus and the devil?
When the devil came to Earth, he was the one with the nail gun.
What thing can jump the highest?
Emo kids, some of them are still in the air.