The jokes

Things said by racist aliens:

"Some of my best friends are Green."

"I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship."

"You're very pretty for a Purple girl."

"We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!"

"Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people."

"You 2-headed people are so stupid!"

"No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes."

"Get out of my store you grigger!"

"The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"

Have you ever seen the clown in Walmart that hides from gay people?

No..... Really?

Hahaha

Grasshole.

I suck his dick with a smile for hours at a time.

Stare at his nutsack while I hold back my cum tonight.

And when he ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle." (And when they ask me what position I say, "Doggystyle.")

But the fact is I can never get off of his fat dick. And all that they can ask is (Ask is, ask is) "I just wanna smack it" (I just wanna smack it)

Here's what the fact is He can put my asshole in a casket (Yuh, yuh, yuh) Asshole in a casket

So you can see I'm cummin' But you won't see me nut. And I'll just keep on suckin', I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

And if he sucks my glizzy I will become dizzy But it keeps us busy, I'm good (Yeah, I'm good)

I've been twerking for boys for so long I've been flirting with boys for so long

My jaw's been hurting for so, so long it's real So long, it's real, so long, it's real

When I'm peeing in a toilet I don't pee directly into the water. I pee on the curved part of the bowl beside the water because I figure it splashes less, but when you're peeing that close to the edge, the sporadic tiny offshoots of pee become a greater threat.

I'm not sure if the accumulation of these offshoots is greater than the potential splashback from peeing mid-bowl. It's possible that I'm thinking about this too much, but it's also possible that I'm not thinking about this enough.

Why did the cow smell?

'Cause the horse gave it a pat on the back.

Chuck Norris is the opposite to Oliver Savage.

What's the difference between all the jokes on this page? Nothing, they're all knockoffs of old jokes you've already heard that aren't funny. Penis!

What do 100,000 battered women have in common? The bitch was wrong!

Three cowboys are at a fire talking about the best things they have done.

Cowboy 1 says, "I have taken out a whole group of raiders with my bare hands."

Cowboy 2 says, "I have killed a herd of bulls with my thumb."

Cowboy 3 chuckles as he mixes the fire with his dick.

Why did Mimi cross the road?

She had cancer.

I asked my uncle why he was living on the streets.

He said that he wasn't always on the streets, he used to have a job at these two towers. I asked him what happened, and he said two planes happened.

DDLC be like: "You kinda left her (Sayori) hanging."

And Yuri TOOK A SEAT...

On the floor.

And died.

The end.

Bro wtf is all this!?

Like fr tho none of this be funny... messed up af to joke abt sum shii that ppl go thru.

Why did the pillow cross the road?

To get to a mattress store!

My sister has cows, and after 4 months, she said there was a mis-steak.

What's the Twin Towers' most favorite band? Al Qaedirection.

Why didn't Superman save the Twin Towers?

Because he's a quadriplegic.

Have you seen the movie "Constipated?"

It hasn’t come out yet.

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

An apple gets picked.

Girls with the name Carley have the biggest forehead on the earth, I mean, moon.