Newest Stage Jokes - Page 3 - Worst Jokes Ever

No, it's not just a crotch grab. Jacko was jacking it on stage when he saw a 6-year-old boy in the front row.

VICTORY ROYALE POKÉMON CARD BE LIKE

DOODLEBOB LV.9999999999 200 HP
I hit U
STAGE 2
chickenugget
weakness
#1 Victory Royale!
+40
hahahahahah
meme on u
resistance
-40
-fake card.
retreat cost
150
200

VICTORY ROYALE IN SPONGEBOB

VAPING IS ALSO BAD

DON'T SMOKE!
WHAT A JOKE!
Within 10 seconds of your first puff,
the toxic chemicals in tobacco
smoke reach your brain, heart and
other organs. Smoking harms
almost every part of your body and
increases your risk of many
diseases. Smoking also affects how
you look and feel, your finances and
the people close to you.
Smoking causes most lung
cancers and can cause
cancer almost anywhere
on the body.
Avg. Annual Deaths Attributable to Cigarette Smoking
In the United States, 2005-2009
Stroke 15,300 (4%)
Other
Diagnoses
56,800 (10%)
Chronic
Obstructive
Pulmonary
Disease
100,600 (21%)
As the nicotine levels in your body fade, your
brain craves more dopamine. The longer you
have been smoking, the more dopamine you
need to feel good. You become dependent on
nicotine.
Other Cancers
36,000 (8%)
X
More Than
479,989
US Deaths Attributable
Each Year to
Cigarette Smoking
The nicotine in tobacco is highly addictive. It makes
your brain release a chemical called dopamine.
Dopamine is a 'feel good' chemical that makes you
feel happy helps you to concentrate gives you more
energy.
Lung Cancer Stages
Lung Cancer
137,989 (29%)
Ischemic
Heart Disease
133,300 (28%)
CL
healthy lungs
early-stage cancer
late-stage cancer
Smoking is major cause of cardiovascular disease, such as heart
disease and stroke. Smoking increases the risk of blood clots,
which block blood flow to the heart, brain or legs. Some
smokers end up having their limbs amputated due to blood
circulation problems caused by smoking.

I was a sit down comedian then i try to stand up I felled

I wished i stayed in the wheelchair.

Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!

Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!

Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!

Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!

What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!

What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”

How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!

What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!

What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!

I was in Russia listening to a stand-up comedian making fun of Putin. The jokes weren't that good, but I liked the execution.

I don’t have another talking stage in me 🤦🏿‍♂️do you squirt & is yo BD dead 😭

Whats the best thing about stage 4 cancer... no stage 5.

Patient number 14 was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma—a type of skin cancer. Pretty ironic how he travels. He went to terminal 14.

*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: You're doing standup tonight right?* Noob Joker (you): *Yes I am!* Owner: Get onto the stage Me: *walks up stage* Owner: this is the standup comedian noobpro Me: HEY GUYS HOW ABOUT SOME DONALD TRUMP Crowd: *RUNS*

Did u here about the emo kid who audition for the school play?

He made the cut

my stepdad has stage 4 cancer and is going through chemo therapy... atleast he saves money on shampoo and conditioner.

What do eggs 🍳 like doing on stage?

Cracking yolks

What’s the best part of stage four cancer?

A: there’s no stage five

Have you seen the inside of Ford's theatre it will blow your mind~abraham Lincoln

why did the orphan become a stripper? so she could have someone to call daddy

I was in Russia at a stand up comedy performance about someone making fun of Putin but the jokes were awful. The execution was nice though

OTHERS (MOTIVATED): If I had FLYING as a SUPERPOWER, FALLING would be the BEGINNING STAGE. ME (DEPRESSED): OK, GOOD IDEA! LETS FALL OFF THE CLIFF AND FLY TO HEAVEN!!