Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.
Don't y'all just hate when something funny to you happens and then you just have to be quiet so you don't look like a villain?
My life is so meaningless that I committed a crime just to get shot. 0-0
This is not a joke; this is just about death...
My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.
Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.
Here's a tip for cow tipping from TheRussianBadger.
"So if you see Otis from Barnyard, make sure you blast his ass from a distance!"
Your mom is so fat Santa Claus came down and said, "Ho ho holy shit!"
So I went to a church the other day and I asked my friend, "Is that painting of Jesus and is it through the wall with one with three nails?" Oh wait, I wasn’t even Jesus, he’s not doing the T post that he invented.
Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding, she’d say: “you’re next.” So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.
Bo: Hey kids, I am so sad that you won’t exercise and give me Bo power, so I am just going to be an orphan.
Kids changing the channel to Annie.
Annie: Tomorrow, tomorrow, only a day away.
TV changing the channel back to Bo On The Go.
Dezzy: WAAAAAAAAAA, I can’t find Bo!
I slit my wrist and said, "THAT'S A LOT OF DAMAGE!" So I did it again, but with a knife and said, "NOW *THAT'S* A LOT OF DAMAGE!" I then put watertight Flex Seal on the wound, and it didn't seal.
Your momma so fat, when she asked for a water bed, she got a concrete bed.
Why do science jokes usually get no reaction?
Because they're so boron!
One day I went skating and skated for so long that my feet were incredibly sore.
It was like my skates were moving all by themselves, but I decided to just roll with the situation.
I had bullies behind me on the street, but they were too fat and slow, so they got ran over by a truck that represents fat and slow.
Yo mama so fat even God could not lift her spirits.
Yo momma so fake, even Barbie got jealous of her!
Your bus is so short... the wheels touch.
Your momma's so fat, when she asked for a water bed, they put a blanket over the ocean.
Aliana is so fat, she can't fit through a hula hoop.
