SOS jokes
Your mama is so far that when she told a joke, no one was laughing, but the floor was literally cracking up.
If a gay male is married to a well-endowed, physically challenged gay male that has been sleeping in bed for three hours nonstop, and he wants him to wake up so he can fix him his morning breakfast, how does he wake him up?
Wake up sleeping Jesus by giving him a blowjob.
Me: why are Americans so good at rubix cubing? Friend: why? Me: they have a history of separating colors.
Yo mama so fat she made KFC go bankrupt.
Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.
Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?
Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.
I noticed my friend's hairline yesterday. I could tell it was a Supercuts hair salon haircut, so how I could tell was 'cuz it was super alright, super lame.
I told a blind man to read more, so he grabbed my arm and read the whole dictionary.
You're so fat, you have your own gravitational pull.
Your hairline is so far, too far, even dark humored jokes are scared of it.
Yo mama's so fat that the earth used to be flat before they buried her.
Your hairline is so far back that when your teacher puts you in the front of the class, your hairline is quite in the back.
Sam's mum is so fat, when she fell down the stairs, I thought EastEnders finished!
Yo mama was so fat that she jumped so hard, and the earth started shaking like an earthquake.
Your momma is so stupid, she farted and turned the radio on to cover up the smell.
Your mum is so bad at cooking, Gordon Ramsey brought back Hitler to show her how to use an oven.
Your hairline is so ugly, like your mum.
Your hairline is so wonky that it looks like the McDonald’s sign.
Girl: I’m so in love with you!
Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.
Girl: What’s the ijk?
Boy: I’m just kidding.
Why was the ant so smart? Because it always knew the answer.
Yo mama so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.