SOS jokes
So, a woman gives birth to a child, and the doctor grabs it by the leg and holds it upside down. Then, he starts swinging it around the room, slamming it into the furniture. The mother tries to get up and starts screaming and crying, “Let my baby go, you sick bastard!” The doctor looks at the mother and stops swinging the baby. He is holding it by the left leg and starts chuckling, “I’m just kidding, it was already dead.”
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
Your mama so fat, it took all the trees to build her a coffin.
Yo mama so ugly when she looked in the mirror, her reflection threw up and ran away.
Your hairline goes so far back it looks like Will Smith slapped it.
Yo mama so fat, she likes long, romantic walks to the refrigerator.
Yo mama is so old that she was born on the first day the universe existed.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to wake up sleeping pills.
Yo mama is so lazy that the only letters she knows are "NO".
So I was just chilling in the World Trade Center, and I got airplane Wi-Fi. I wonder why....
Yo mama so fat, when she decides to workout, the stock market goes bankrupt.
Yo mama so fat she is the Google JavaScript loading.
Your hairline is so bad when you need a role model who has been having a tough life, you go to your barber.
Your hairline is so bad it was used as the Starbucks logo!
Yo mama was so fat, the Earth was flat before they put your mama in a grave.
This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!
I had to take the underground just to get from your forehead to your hairline, they're so far apart!!!
What came before the dinosaurs?
Your hairline, because it's so far back!
Yo mama so poor, she used a KFC bucket as a rain hat.
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.