I love Brussel sprouts more than I love myself.
You know, people always say your life is worth it, but with me, it's worth-it-less.
It's ironic that the more other people love you, the more you hate yourself.
They say people are 75% water.
But I'm 100% useless.
Why are we depressed, is it because that bully in your school, or that you have acne, how about when you listen to you sad song playlist, maybe cause you have no friends, Or is it the fact your anime girlfriend is fake. T^T
Yes, I'm CUTE.
C-ringe U-gly T-errible E-mpty.
If you were a food, what would you be?
Friend 1: "Pizza, cause I'm so cheesy."
Friend 2: "Chocolate chip cookie, cause I have lots of friends."
Me: "Donut, cause I'm so empty inside."
If I wanted to kill myself, I would climb up to the top of your ego and jump to your IQ.
Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"
Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."
