A panda walks into a restaurant orders some food and eats it. Once he was done he shoots the waiter then leaves. Police and detectives arrive at the scene, they ask the waiter "who did this to you? what happened?" The waiter replies "A panda, eats shoots and leaves"
Wanna hear a joke about paper, Never mind, its tearable.
What is your favorite and a man an amend the rapper
what meds do snakes with ADHD take? Adder-all
I heard there was a kidnapping
Don't worry he woke up
In the back of a van
It was his father's
Friend who was a priest
He was just bringing him to church
What do you call someone who makes a joke about Bread society? The Doughker
Bruh don’t be punny
(True story) Today I was bring some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “oh, now they’re broken.” And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
what do you say when jacks late to sex ed??? aye-jack-you-late
What site does a vegetable go when he/she is stressed?
cornhub.com
Why 6 hate 7 ? Because 7 ate 9
A man was raping a woman and thought the year was 1970 and he exclaimed to the judge later that he was her husband. She got sent to the Asylum for Hysteria.
Wait, what? Was he actually her husband. He was a christian so that actually meant he was AFTER the rape.
Wait, what? the bible doesn't say that.
Actually yes it does and marital rape was legal until 1990.
WAIT WHAT? Thats not funny.
I'll tell ya whats funny, that you think the women have nothing to complain about.
Whats black and white and red all over? The darkness of your heart, the dishonour of your lies, and the embarrassment you feel when busted for both.
If you got a bowling ball and you stuck it on top of a sack of potatoes what would you get? A retiree
What does a volcano say when it has a runny nose “I have a runny volcanoes”
Id make a joke about pizza, but its too cheesy. I know yall have too thick of a crust to get it!
Boss: how good are you at powerpoint? Me: I Excel at it. Boss: Was that a microsoft pun? Me: Word
What is the same between water and dark jokes? Not everyone gets it!
What do you call you mom.
Monkey
