PurplePanda

@purplepanda

Registered on · 19 followers · Last active 10 months ago

Tea

  • Jazzy, please explain everything that happened... I want the tea. Also, Jazzy, what happened to your phone number and Insta?

    Toaster

  • And God said to John, "Come forth, and you shall be granted eternal life."

    But John came fifth and won a toaster.

  • 4
  • Kid

  • Kid !: What are you doin? Kid 2: Laying in my bed! Kid 1: Naked? Kid 2: Yes Ld 1: Show me! Kid 2: Its dark! Kid 1: Still show me! Kid 2 Ok-

    A dark image with a stylized pink mask in the center. The mask has two crossed 'X's for eyes and a jagged mouth.

    Dinner

  • Son: What's for dinner tonight?

    Mom: Steak!

    Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?

    Mom: HUNGER!

    Insult

  • Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.

    Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.

    Kid 1: Aw, thanks!

    Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10

    Kid

  • Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me?

    Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you!

    Kid 1: Aw, do you love me?

    Kid 2: No!

    Book

  • I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.

    Halloween

  • Hey guys, I have a question.

    Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?