
Emogirl
Emogirl
I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger, then it hit me.
Emogirl
And God said to John, "Come forth and you shall be granted eternal life." But John came fifth and won a toaster.
Emogirl
What did the full glass say to the empty glass? "You look drunk."
Emogirl
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.
Emogirl
What's the difference between a golfer and a skydiver? A golfer goes whack "darn" and a skydiver goes "darn" whack.
Emogirl
Son: What's for dinner tonight? Mon: Steak! Son: Mom you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me? Mim: HUNGER!
Emogirl
Kid 1: Words can describe how ugly you are. Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are. Kid 1: Aw, thx! Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
Emogirl
Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me? Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you! Kid 1: Aw, do you love me? Kid 2: No!
Emogirl
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.
Emogirl
If the sun is 9n space, then why is there light on earth, but not in space?
Emogirl
What do you call it when you baptize a mexacan? Bean dip!
Emogirl
Hey guts I have a question. Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Than what is halloween?
Emogirl
if earth is the 3rd planet from the sun, does that mean that every country us a 3rd world country?
Emogirl
How do u make holy water? You boil the hell out of it!