Programming

Programming Jokes

Momma

Your Momma's so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.

Orphanage

I was asked to design a website for an orphanage, so I decided to design it without the home page.

Beaver

I just watched a program about beavers. It was the worst dam program I've ever seen.

Robot

A robot walks into a bar and orders a martini.

The bartender is flabbergasted that a robot can do that.

"New around here?" said the bartender.

"Nah, been here a while," said the robot.

Bartender "You can talk?"

Robot "Yeah, pretty cool, huh."

Bartender "Why do you want a martini?"

Robot "Oh, I'm just in the mood for one, you know?"

The bartender is shocked to see a robot making completely normal small talk.

The robot seems to be just like a normal human.

"Wow, who programmed you?" asked the bartender.

"The top minds in the world," said the robot.

The robot speaks again, "I have a question for you..."

Bartender, "What?"

"Why did you read this entire story? It does not have a punchline. I just wasted your time. Get bamboozled, nerd!"

School

What do inner city schools and databases have in common?

Their problems are usually caused by a race condition.

Robot

Why did the robot cross the road?

Because he was programmed by the chicken!

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  • Mama

    Yo mama is so stupid that she thought NASA is a gaming program!

    Opinion

    Unpopular opinion about programming but,

    "Uncaught TypeError: Cannot read property 'myUnpopularOpinion' of undefined."

    AI

    AI - AI - Rabo several projects:

    Decker: “No Hebingingennanorin and Chirver.”

    Alx: “Madam Bob Lee Hubn Vera 20”

    Credit Card

    Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?

    When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.

    URL

    Looks like URL encoding is enabled for special characters inside comments. Good job to whoever developed this website!

    Baby

    Baby > commits start breathing.

    Mom > commits abort.

    Baby > commits ohshit.exe