Pregnancy

Pregnancy Jokes

Incest

My mother was suffering from menstrual pain. So I fucked her for 7 hours to ease her pain. I continued to do so for the next 6 days. Even after fucking her 51 times during her 7-day period, I fucked her 5-6 times a day for the next three months and stopped her period for 9 months! Only her son can understand and ease the pain of a mother.

Slave

What does a pregnant slave and a payless sale have in common?

Buy one, get one free.

Miscarriage

What’s 9 inches long and makes my girlfriend scream?

One inch and put it in her. Her miscarriage.

Slave

What does a pregnant slave and a "pay less" sale have in common?

Buy one, get one free.

Scientist

Scientists have proven that there are two things in the air that have been known to cause women to get pregnant: their legs.

Abortion

What's the most embarrassing thing about locking your keys in the car outside a pregnancy care center?

Having to go inside and ask for a coat hanger.

Mum

Your mum is so slow, it took her nine months to make a joke.

Miscarriage

When you find out your wife had a miscarriage,

So you start singing "It’s the best day ever!"

Abortion

Men play video games to let their inner child out, while women do abortions.

School Shooter

One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.

How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?