Parent jokes
If you're ever bored, kick an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Little Johnny walked to his parents' room. They were having sex, and Little Johnny didn’t know what that was, so he said, "What are y’all doing?"
The parents replied, "Umm, r-rapping presents!"
Little Johnny said, "Okay," and then left. In the morning, Little Johnny opened his presents. His parents said, "This one is from Santa!"
Little Johnny said, "No, it’s not, y’all said y’all were rapping the presents."
The parents said, "Ohh fuck!"
Little Johnny replied, "What, Mommy and Daddy?" They replied, "Oh, nothing!" "Oh, okay," Little Johnny said. The mom whispered in the dad's ear, "At least he doesn’t know the truth."
Little Johnny said, "What truth?"
Well, a boy and a girl are in a bathtub together.
The little boy says, “Hey, you see that? I’m gonna go ask Daddy what it is.” When the little boy asks his dad, he says, “Well, son, that’s your car. You try to park it in a girl’s parking spot.”
As the boy runs back, he see’s the little girl is missing. It had turned out that the little girl was asking her mama what her spot was and she said, “Well, that’s your parking spot. Never ever let a boy put it in.” When she got back, the little boy tried to put the car in, well he did and she ended up breaking his car that day.
Why do orphans only have 362 days of the year?
... bc they don’t have Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, or Thanksgiving.
We should bully foster parents more for raising parent-less nobodies.
Memes
What makes a joke a dad joke? When it leaves and doesn't come back.
A father came to his daughter's 18th birthday. He finally came.
Even if orphans fail their exams, I'm sure their parents wouldn't...
Oh wait...
What is the difference between an adopted kid and an orphan?
If you're adopted, you're actually wanted.
Kid: Knock, knock.
Orphan: Who’s there?
Kid: Not your parents.
Some people say I'm rude, but I think I'm pretty nice because the other day I saw this kid crying on the road and I asked him where his parents were. I just love looking at an orphanage.
Why do orphans never get a car?
Because their parents need to buy them one.
What is the difference between an orphan and a mailman?
The mailman goes home at the end of the day.
An orphan came out of the closet to their parents as gay. Oh wait...
School Bully: How's your girlfriend? Oh wait, you don't have any!
Me: How's your parents? Oh wait, you don't have any! *Continues to burn down orphanage*
Why do orphans make the best girlfriends?
Because they don't need permission from their parents.
What do Nemo and an orphan have in common? They can't find their parents.
Man: Stop with these orphan jokes!
Me: Why? Are they going to tell their parents on me?
1st daughter: Dad, I'm lesbian!
Dad: Oh, OK!
2nd daughter: I'm also lesbian.
Dad: WTF, does any 1 in this family love dicks?!?
Son: I do...
Why did the orphan dig six feet under?
To find his parents.