Paralysis jokes
My dad went to go buy milk, but he walks as slow as my grandmother.
My grandmother is paralyzed in the legs.
What is the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
What's got 4 legs and is stronger than Superman?
Christopher Reeve's horse.
A man in a wheelchair and his friend were walking down the street.
Man in Wheelchair: *falls out of wheelchair*
Friend: Are you okay?
Man in Wheelchair: I can't feel my legs!
Guy 1: What's your favorite vegetable?
Guy 2: Stephen Hawking.
There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.
It's called "Unplugged!"
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
His left shoulder.
Stephen Hawking walking, oops, he does not do that anymore.
Stephen is lucky he doesn’t need a vibrator.
He’s got himself.
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeve?
Christopher Walken.
What's Stephen Hawking's other favorite song?
Steve Winwood's "Just Roll with It Baby."