Music jokes
Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she’ll let it goo!
When an emo asks you to hang out under a tree...
Why do violists stand for long periods outside of people's houses? They can't find the key and don't know when to come in.
What did the rapper say at the bakery?
"I need ALL the dough you got!"
Michael Jackson and Kelly Clarkson both did shady stuff to children. Michael Jackson said that there is nothing wrong with sharing a bed with unrelated small children. Kelly Clarkson said that there is nothing wrong with physically beating a small child.
The thing is, though, only one of them made "Billie Jean" or "Beat It", and the other is just a typical karaoke country singer. So no surprise people gave Wacko Jacko a pass.
I have to file a complaint against Spotify because I didn’t see you on my hot singles last week.
Why did the rapper become an archaeologist?
Because he wanted to dig for old-school beats!
How do rappers like their steaks?
With lots of SIZZLE!
Would you rather listen to Justin Bieber or die in the slowest and most painful way possible?
They're the same thing.
John Lennon: "What a nice view."
John walked outside.
He got shot.
:skull:
What is Michael Jackson’s favorite song? “Little Drummer Boy.”
Sans: What am I using?
A trom-bone!
What's a rapper's favorite drink?
RHYME-A-RITA
What's an orphan's favorite band?
Foster the People 😂
What does Michael Jackson say when he stubs his toe?
Ow!
Two to the one from the one to the three, I like good pussy and I like good trees, Smoke so much weed you wouldn't believe, And I get more ass than a toilet seat.
Three to the one from the one to the three, I met a bad bitch last night in the D, Let me tell you how I made her leave with me, Conversation and Hennessey.
I've been to the motherfuckin' mountain top, Heard motherfuckers talk, seen and dropped, If I ain't got a weapon I'ma pick up a rock, And when I bust yo ass I'ma continue to rock.
Getcha ass of the wall with your two left feet, It's real easy just follow the beat, Don't let that fine girl pass you by, Look real close 'cause strobe lights blind.
What do you call a rapper who's also a doctor?
Dr. Dre.
Did you hear about the song Rihanna wrote about the tin can?
It was called "S & N."
Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?
He woke up and found out it was true.
Why did the rapper wear sunglasses?
To SHADE the HATERS!