Mower jokes
I still remember my grandpa's last words: "Turn the lawn mower off!"
Why do people want emo grass? Because it'll cut itself.
Life would be so much easier if grass was emo.
Because it would cut itself.
I wish my lawn was emo. Then it would cut itself.
What do you call a cow that eats grass?
A lawn mooer.
How do you cut your grass without a lawn mower?
You dye it blue and it will cut itself.
What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a parakeet?
Shredded tweet!
What is the difference between emo grass and normal grass?
Emo grass cuts itself.
How do you make a baby cry?
You run over it with a lawn mower.
A Lew runs into a wall, what does he break? His Nose.
A Mexican runs into a wall, what does he break? His lawn mower.
Humpty Dumpty fell off the wall, his mom did a terri-fried call.
He got hurt in a egg-cident, and it never got eggs-elent.
When the eggs-plant was over, he got told to use the mower.
It happened too fast, he watched the very last.
Next he died, eaten all fried.
I tried to name my grass "emo" so it will cut itself.
How do you get your grass to cut itself?
Make it depressed.
What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists?
Nothing, I cut both of them.
I'm starting to wish my grass was emo.
Why?
So it would cut itself.
I wish my grass was emo, then it would cut itself.
Two windmills are standing in a field and one asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?" The other says, "I'm a big metal fan."