Morbidity jokes
- The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.
- How did the gay person die? Homicide.
- Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.
- When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.
- I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.
- I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.
- How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.
I'll pat your breasts, pat your breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", And then throw you in the fire cos you're now worthless to me!
Hey, yesterday I played with my sister. When I woke up, she was gone.
What’s the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Getting them back in the wheelchair.
A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, "Any last requests?" "Yes," replied the murderer, "Will you please hold my hand?"
What’s long, yellow, and doesn’t float?
A school bus filled with children.
Are you a gravestone?
Because I really wish you were on top of me right now!
Who needs storage on a computer? Just use an Asian's brain.
Actually doing homework.
"Knock knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Baby!"
"Baby who?"
"Do you want to eat this baby that I have prepared?"
"No thanks, I already ate."
Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.
Grandma isn’t responding. Close app, wait, cancel.
Which do you choose?
My relatives always teased me during weddings, saying, "You'll be next!"
But they stopped when I did the same to them during funerals.
I went on a date last night and told my date I worked with animals every day.
She said, "Oh, how sweet. What do you do?" I said, "I'm a butcher."
The patient said, "When will this be over?"
The doctor said, "After you die."
The patient says, "Was that a morbid joke?"
The doctor says, "Well, um, actually, you'll die because we broke the needles and the cure."
The patient says, "Well, it's a bright day, maybe if you weren't clumsy!"
This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!
How do you spell racecar backwards?
racecar
How do you spell racecar sideways?
Paul Walker's death.
Why did half of the world go to hell?
Because they were laughing at morbid jokes.
(You've been warned!)
What does a perverted frog say? Rub it.
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom.
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped.
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender.
Even people who are good for nothing have the capacity to bring a smile to your face, for instance when you push them down the stairs.