Morbidity jokes

I'll pat your breasts, pat your breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you better bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", And then throw you in the fire cos you're now worthless to me!

This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!

So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car.

Lea looks at him, puzzled, then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?"

Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..."

Actually doing homework.

Hey, yesterday I played with my sister. When I woke up, she was gone.

What did Superman say to Batman?

Nothing, Bruce is dead.

What’s green, fuzzy, and falls out of a tree? A pool table.

I went to school and everyone was screaming and looking at me. They weren't after I shot them, though.

Tell me morbid jokes in comments so I have some jokes for my friend.

A knife is like hallucinations, both in your head.

"Morbidity, the story of my life in one joke."

Q: Why are morbid jokes so cruel?

A: Because they are!