Misery jokes
You wanna know why I love trains?
They end my suffering.
I have a paper cut from writing my suicide note... it's a start...
Being alive is so expensive, I am not even having a good time doing it.
What makes sad people jump? A bridge.
Can some hot depressed suicidal guy give me his number so we can cry about being depressed and wanting to die?
Imagine being an orphan. *kid beside me crying*
It's funny how you feel so alone with depression, and yet once you tell people on some random website, so many people relate. Unfortunately, it doesn't stop the loneliness.
My life is like a grenade... I pull off the ring and, BOOM, it explodes!
My life.
Are you going to jump? Can I jump with you?
Friends: "You wanna hang with us?"
Me: "No, I wanna hang myself."
You learn from the best.
Hey I have a joke for you.
My life hahah. I wanna die.
My life is the joke.
I wish I was dead like my jokes.
The only time you see a depressed person lifted up is when they hang themselves.
I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet.
Then I was even sadder, because that lucky guy didn't even *need* shoes!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
My life.
My life who?
My life is depressing...
Tell me a joke.
My life.
Orphans are the best targets for bullying, since who are they gonna cry to? Their parents?
Me and a person downtown.
Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night.
Me: I guess so.
Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this?
Me: I don't know. I used to, but don't anymore.
Person: Why'd you stop?
Me: Unfortunately, I lived every time I'd try something.