Mental Health jokes
Depressed people have beautiful smiles. Okay, it's not a joke for normal people, but it's a joke for us.
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal?
LIFE.
I've looked everywhere... I just can't seem to find where I left my will to live.
In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.
One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid.
Man: "Hang in there! I'm gonna get some help!"
Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said.
RIP Daniel Kyre from Cyndago (July 6, 1994-September 18, 2015)
Daniel committed suicide five years ago today......
A depressed guy walks into a utensil store and finds a knife, but he didn't stab himself... Part 2 coming out tomorrow.
On the plus side, I finally hear voices talking to me... just wish they were outside my head.
Suicide: Turning one's biology into complex organic chemistry.
I got so bad about cutting myself every time I went to the bathroom, I wanted to break my jacket zipper off and use that!
What's great about an emo pizza?
It cuts itself. Yay!
You wanna hear a suicide joke? Nvm, it didn't make it.
Are you depression? 'Cause you're always on my mind~
What do you get when I get mixed with coffee?
De-presso.
Someone broke into my house and took my anti-depressants... I hope they're happy now.
Tomorrow is Christmas, and I'm giving myself a present that I can't wait to open. It's my wrist. (Yes, this was inspired by a Fall Out Boy song.)
What’s the difference between my lawn and my wrists?
Nothing, I cut both of them.
I tend to think my ‘depression’ is for attention. I guess I have depressed depression.
My dad is like my depression, you need a suicide letter to find him.
I wish the grass in my back lawn was emo, because then it would cut itself.
Suicide is never the answer.
Suicide is the question.
The answer is yes.