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Text message

Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of a Twitter post. At the top, a profile picture shows a person. The name 'Nate' and username '@Pure_VEVO' are visible. The main text of the tweet reads: 'HOLY SHIT MY NUMBER NEIGHBOR IS BILL CLINTON'. Below the tweet is a screenshot of a text message conversation. On the left, messages from the user include: 'Hi', 'Who is this???', 'Oh okay', 'Really? Are you someone famous?', and 'That's crazy!'. On the right, messages from the 'number neighbor' include: 'Hey number neighbor!', 'We're number neighbors meaning your number is one digit higher than mine', 'You may have heard of me', 'That's the name', and 'It's an honor Mr. President'. An image of a smiling Bill Clinton is sent by the 'neighbor'. The final message from the 'neighbor', partially visible, reads: 'I killed Jeffrey Epstein lol'.
  • 0
  • Fortnite

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of the Fortnite in-game shop displaying three items for purchase. The main heading is 'Jerkmate Ranked'. The first item is a 'Jerkmate Ranked' bundle, marked as 1,200 V-bucks off, and originally priced at 2,400-3,600 V-bucks. It features a half-red, half-blue robot character (Jerkbot) and associated items. The 'Jerkbot' character is also available separately for 1,600 V-bucks. The second item is 'Lube Looter', a pickaxe shaped like two white lotion bottles, priced at 800 V-bucks. The third item is 'Leaked CIA Files', depicted as a brown folder, priced at 1,200 V-bucks. Overlaid text at the bottom reads: 'Fortnite really just be collaborating with anyone.'
  • 0
  • Satire

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A still from a Marvel movie shows Tony Stark, portrayed by Robert Downey Jr., with a perplexed expression while looking at a holographic display of a spinning Earth. Above the image, white text on a black background reads: "The Onion trying to write a more ridiculous article title after getting one upped by reality every week."
  • 0
  • O

    Online persona

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • An X profile screenshot. The profile picture is a photo of Jeffrey Epstein with a dog ear filter. The banner image features anime characters in an embrace. The display name is 'Adolf (He/Tler),' and the username includes offensive terms like 'RacistShOtaLOlHitlerGrapist69.' The bio combines contradictory terms such as 'Super Straight,' 'Socialist,' 'Vegan,' and 'Pet Lover,' alongside hashtags associated with Nazism and white supremacy (#EinVolkEinReichEinFuhrerDE, #WLM, #AJAB). The text ends with 'spread kindness 🥺🥺 SUB TO MY ONLYFANS.'
  • 1
  • Restraint

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of a dark mode text post displays an explicit fanfiction excerpt. A picture of Walter White from Breaking Bad, wearing his Heisenberg hat and glasses, with a beard, is superimposed over the text. Red circles highlight Walter White's face, the words 'Say my name,' and 'name.' The text describes a highly suggestive scene where a character is 'trembling from restraint' and eventually pleads, 'Please. I need you. Say my name.' The final sentence reads: 'He's falling apart. He's breaking. You're making him burn, and he loves every second of it.'
  • 0
  • Player

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A meme featuring an annoyed-looking, anthropomorphic caterpillar with large blue eyes and a cigarette hanging from its mouth, exhaling smoke. It is perched on a branch. Above the caterpillar, white text on a black background reads: "How Mario Kart Players look at you when you press the Gas button to drive instead of using the Japanese shiddle flick glitch that gives you a 0.2 second headstart."
  • 0
  • World Trade Center

    Willy b · 1 year ago
  • An image of the World Trade Center towers during the 9/11 attacks, depicting a large fiery explosion emanating from one tower and smoke rising from both. The text "indoor parking isn't working huh" is overlaid at the top of the image.
  • 0
  • Meme

    Anonymous · 1 year ago
  • Gonna need some comments here! | Daily Spooky Meme #4

    A cartoon skeleton, looking distressed, holds its boney hands to its head with an open mouth and angry eyebrows. The background is dark. Above the skeleton, the text reads: "When you post a spooky meme and no one comments 'thank mr skeltal'".
  • 4
  • Basement

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A photograph of a crudely constructed mace-like weapon lying on a wooden floor. The weapon has a wooden handle wrapped with black electrical tape, a spiked head made of several metallic, pointed objects, and a silver-colored, teardrop-shaped butt plug attached to the very end of the handle. The text on the image reads: "I found this in my friend's basement. What is this? Posted in r/ItemShop".
  • 2
  • Injury

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • An advertisement for injury law is displayed inside a subway car. The ad features a smiling man in a suit on the left and a slogan that reads "IT'S AMAZING HOW A BIG FAT C CK CAN EASE THE PAIN." A vertical metal pole partially obscures the word "CHECK", making it appear as a vulgar word. Below the main text, a phone number "800 PAIN-LAW" is visible. On the subway doors below the ad, there are signs that say "Do not hold doors". A person's head is partially visible at the bottom right corner.
  • 3
  • Impalement

    Willy b · 1 year ago
  • A historical portrait of Vlad the Impaler, a man with a long nose, dark mustache, and long dark hair, wearing an ornate hat with jewels and a gold-trimmed tunic. The text overlay reads: "TRUST ME. YOU ONLY HAVE TO IMPALE A FEW OF THEM. THE REST WILL GO HOME."
  • 0
  • President

    Big Jim · 1 year ago
  • 🫡

    A black and white image depicting two men shaking hands. The man on the left, with a beard and a hat, resembles Abraham Lincoln. The man on the right is a Black man, looking towards Lincoln. The text overlaid on the image reads: "President Abraham Lincoln meets the first freed slave after the signing The Emancipation Proclamation in 1863:".
  • 0
  • Hammer

    Big Jim · 1 year ago
  • It could be if you believe

    A close-up of a claw hammer with a wooden handle and a grey metal head. The brand name "STANLEY" is visible vertically along the handle. Overlaying the image in white text with a black outline are the words "this is not a drill".
  • 0
  • Rock

    Willy b · 7 months ago
  • A meme featuring a pile of smooth, multi-colored rocks. Above the rocks, the text reads, "One of the best biblical analogies I've seen yet." Below the rocks, the text continues, "Good thing God didn't ban rocks after Cain killed Abel. Otherwise, David would have been defenceless against Goliath." There is a small "CocoFun" logo at the bottom right.
  • 0
  • Dust

    Willy b · 6 months ago
  • A photograph of a woman with dark hair in an updo alongside a humorous, nonsensical obituary for "Brenda Tent." The text describes her retiring from living at the "age of old," being a librarian from birth, married to her high school, and being a literal bird. It ends by stating her funeral will be held in 1977 in heaven and asks for people to send her "more life" instead of flowers.
  • 0
  • Weather

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of a phone's weather forecast. The background is a gradient of red. At the top, white text reads, "gonna need a coat on tuesday 😭🙏". Below this, a list of days and their corresponding temperatures is displayed. The days listed are "Today" (27°), "Monday" (18°-28°), followed by "Doomsday" (21°-1000°). The subsequent days are "Wed" (15°-24°), "Thu" (13°-22°), "Fri" (10°-22°), "Sat" (12°-22°), and "Sun" (11°-20°). The temperature for Doomsday, 1000°, is highlighted in red.
  • 2
  • Movie

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A close-up photo of actor Don Cheadle, wearing glasses and a dark shirt, looking straight ahead with a serious, almost judgmental expression. Overlayed text reads: "how film majors will look at you when you tell them your favorite movie is fast and furious instead of a 1932 french film about the life of a blade of grass that can only be found in a saudi arabian pawn shop and the british vaults".
  • 0
  • Shower

    Anonymous · 1 year ago
  • A two-panel illustration comparing men and women before and after a shower. The top panel, labeled 'MAN', shows a man with messy, unkempt hair and beard before a shower, and a clean-cut, well-groomed man after a shower. The bottom panel, labeled 'WOMAN', shows an attractive woman with styled hair before a shower, and a woman with wet, matted hair and a distorted, unappealing face after a shower.
  • 0
  • Cash

    Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago
  • A screenshot of a tweet from 'Daily Noud' stating, 'Tyler, The Creator just found out the tooth fairy is not real. He was reportedly upset after waking up to no cash under his pillow.' Below the text are two images side-by-side. On the left, a photo of a man, Tyler, The Creator, wearing a baseball cap and a pinstriped shirt, looks with a confused or displeased expression. On the right, a cartoon illustration of a tooth fairy with blonde hair, a tiara, blue dress, and wings, holding a magic wand and a tooth, floating on a cloud under a crescent moon.
  • 0
  • Cat

    Paytonnn · 1 year ago
  • A still image of Bernie Sanders, an older man with white hair and glasses, wearing a brown winter coat, standing outdoors in a snowy or cold environment. He looks directly at the camera with a serious expression. Above the image, text reads 'Me: My cat at 4am:'. Below him, superimposed text on a dark bar reads 'I am once again asking for your constant attention and salmon.'
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