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News

5 views · Celaena · 2 years ago

Everytime 😭😭

A three-panel image showing two anime characters. In the first panel, a girl with dark hair says, "Mom, I have good news!". In the second panel, a woman with light hair replies, "You got 100 on your math test?!" The third panel shows the dark-haired girl looking disappointed, saying, "Mom, I said good news. Not a miracle."

Meme

4 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A person is at their computer, typing on the keyboard. Another person is close and saying "Babe, come to bed", and the first person responds in a speech bubble: "Not now. I gotta post memes for my mentally unstable followers."

Forklift

5 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A dark image of a penguin with wide eyes and its beak open with the text: "YES, I CAN BE TRUSTED TO USE A 2 TON FORKLIFT. I WILL ABSOLUTELY NOT RAM IT INTO ANY CO-WORKERS ON DECEMBER 16TH 2021."

Touch

5 views · DIANEE · 1 year ago

A black dragon with yellow eyes and white teeth looks directly at the viewer, while a hand is reaching for him. The text says "NO! NO TOUCHY! At least, not until you wash those hands of yours."

Video Game

5 views · LtPancakes98 · 1 year ago

care to explain bitch? it seems thats what youre good at

The image shows a text box that contains the text "Explain Bear. Alright, listen up, you smoothbrain. You're here 'cause you don't know that Doom Eternal is a first-person shooter, not a driving game. There ain't no cars to customize, see? The image shows a search result mixin' up Doom Eternal with GTA. The car customization is a GTA thing. You got it? You just mixed up two different video games."

Car

5 views · MATTIX · 1 year ago

The image shows two cars and the text "If your car doesn't scare you a little, it's not fast enough." The top picture shows a red sports car with smoke coming from the tires. The bottom picture shows a small red car on two wheels.

Weed

7 views · Anonymous · 1 year ago

Shitpost-master general

A weed bag with Spongebob smoking is lying on the ground with the text "Do NOT want to run into whoever been smoking this." on the bottom of the image.

Life

31 views · Heroin Monkey · 1 year ago

A screenshot of a 4chan post. The anonymous poster lists a series of things they are not obsessed with such as NFTs, being transphobic or a nazi, male hierarchies, Twitter, pop stars, and annoying youtubers. The poster concludes that life is good and encourages others not to be dumbasses.

Game

4 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image is a screenshot of a text conversation. On the right is a screen capture of a game perspective showing Barack Obama standing in a supermarket aisle. The game screen has several square icons overlaid. The text in the blue text bubble above says "Five Night's at Barracks.". Below the image on the left is a text bubble that reads "You're not funny stop".

Rape

72 views · Anonymous · 1 month ago

A close-up image of actor Willem Dafoe's face, widely grinning with a sinister expression. Text at the top reads: "LET'S NOT TURN THE RAPE INTO A MURDER." Text at the bottom reads: "GRIN."

Alcohol

112 views · Willy b · 1 month ago

A meme featuring text at the top: "Doctors: Alcohol is killing you slowly. Me: That's okay, I'm not in a hurry." Below is a photo of Richard Hammond, James May, and Jeremy Clarkson from The Grand Tour standing on a boat. Richard Hammond is labeled "Me:", while James May and Jeremy Clarkson are labeled "Doctors:".

Alpha male

33 views · Heroin Monkey · 7 months ago

"irresistible to women"

A screenshot of a Twitter post by a user named "Richard Strocher". The tweet text says: "We are the republicans your parents warned you about. We're smart, irresistible to women, and most importantly we're total alpha males. We are the future whether you like it or not. Stay mad!". Below the text, there is a collage of three images showing different young, white men. The man on the left is smiling, wearing a suit and red tie, with the White House in the background. The man in the top right is also smiling, wearing a suit, against a blurry background. The man in the bottom right has a somewhat broader face, a slight smile, and is shown in front of an American flag.

Allergy

5 views · Jazzy💕 · 2 years ago

Why just why

A person reacting to seasonal allergies. The text on the image reads: "When your body has to adjust to the sudden change in temperature so your nose is bothering you non stop."

Man

2 views · Im totally not drunk 2.0 · 2 years ago

As a man can confirm

A toy in its packaging is labeled "Useless Man". It says, "This man contributes absolutely nothing to society! Lazy. Unwashed. Just lies around all day eating chips. Now with clothing!"

Wife

5 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot from what looks like a children's show, showing a man in an orange shirt in the center with Elmo and another muppet next to him. The text says: "While the rest of them are telling Mr. Johnson not to jump, Elmo antagonizes him by telling him he fucked his wife too."

Internet

2 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A comic strip shows a character getting annoyed by the incorrect use of "its" on the internet. He corrects the error and congratulates himself for "fixing" the world.

Control

6 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows three panels. The top two panels show an anime character with dark hair in emotional distress. The text reads "Sometimes I'm not me" and "Sometimes He controls me". The bottom panel shows a bright green cartoon character with red gloves.

Darth Vader

4 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The top part of the image is a screenshot of a website WillYouPressTheButton.com. It shows a red button with a hand pointing at it. There are two texts. One states, "You can use the force". The other says, "Every time you enter a room, Darth Vader's Theme plays all the way through." Below, there is a picture of Darth Vader sitting in a chair, shrugging. There is the text "i ain't even mad" below the image.

Girlfriend

12 views · TechPriestGotDrip · 3 years ago

A side-by-side comparison of a girlfriend and a Keetongu figure, listing their attributes in table form. The girlfriend is described as being pretty but not always, knows makeup, will choose a bad boy, can break your heart, forces you to choose between her and friend, and is a weak fighter that needs protection. Keetongu is described as beautiful, with a symmetric shape, knows every kind of poison, will distinguish good and evil, will always protect with an absorbing shield, will help you save your friend, and can crush Sidorak with his bare hands.

Cat

2 views · 𝓼𝓸𝓷 𝓰𝓸𝓴𝓾 · 1 year ago

The image is a compilation of several pictures of cats with captions. One cat is running, another looks cute, one is fat and being begged not to be eaten, and another says it can change.

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