What's the difference between a piranha and a teenage girl?
The piranha doesn't wear makeup.
I rub lipstick on my forehead to make up my mind
Are you a lollipop? Because I can suck on you all day. Are you an Oreo? Because I eat the cream first. Are you a microwave? Because I’m trying to keep you quiet at 3:00 am. Are you a sprinkler? Cause every time I see you I get wet. Are you makeup? Cause I’d spend hours doing you. Are you a guitar? Because I’d love to hear the noises you make when I play with you. Are you an elevator? Cause I wanna ride you up and down. Most restaurants are closed at night.. but your legs aren’t. I’m not a cashier, but you got a couple of things I wanna check out. Are you Cinderella? Because I can see that dress coming off at midnight. Are you a calendar? Because I want to pin you against the wall. I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately... but I hope it’s you. Are you a doughnut? Cause I wanna fill you with cream. Are you a garden? Cause I want to plant some seeds inside of you. Do you sing in the shower? Because if so I need a private ticket of your concert. Are your legs the twin towers? Because I’ll bomb what’s in between. Are you a blanket? Because your on top of me every night. Are you a phone? Cause I like to be on you 24/7. Are you a roller coaster? Because the faster you go, the louder I scream. I’m so jealous of your heart right now because it’s pounding inside of you and I’m not. Are you a popsicle? Cause all I want to do is lick you up and down. Are you a construction worker? Because you got me all bricked up. Are you a fireman? Because you came in hot and left me wet.
What the difference with you and a Barbie there is no difference both of your face is fake
Do you wanna eat make up cause ur not pretty in the inside
Ur so ugly when you put makeup on it makes you look like a clown
Your leg is straighter than James Charles
Someone at school asked what makeup I was wearing.
I said ‘ a smile’
They are now following me around asking if my mental health is okay
My plan to avoid them is to not go to school
Going to school is mandatory in this country
Can you guess my plan?
The other day, my girlfriend asked me to pass her lipstick, but I accidentally passed her a glue stick.
She still isn't talking to me.
Holly shit there's so many yo mama jokes Heres mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the twin towers Yo mama so old that she has jesus's autograph Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her Yo mama so dumb that she thought rocket league was a competition between kids in wheelchairs
your so ugly when you went to the makeup store it shut down
I am a God Na, na, na, na, na, na Yeah She's got makeup by the mirror in her bedroom Thigh-high fishnets and some black boots Nose pierced with the cigarette perfume Half dead, but she still looks so cute She is a monster in disguise And she knows all the words to the trap songs Takes pic's with a cherry-red lipstick Says she only dates guys with a big..., mmm
I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.
I needn't have bothered.
The next day, it was smeared all over my face.
Me:Mom can I have some make up. Mom: no. You are beautiful just the way you. Me:So that’s why you were make up.
Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead?
To make up her mind.
What's red and got makeup all over?
A bill cosby victim
Women be like I don't wear makeup for men. Then gets mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!
