Loss jokes
Q: What's the hardest thing about losing your virginity?
A: Making sure she doesn't wake up.
So an orphan was crying in a corner in the dark. Then a man came over and asked, "Why are you crying?"
Then said, "Do you want me to get your parents?"
I was at a funeral and made a joke. No one laughed, but someone died.
There is an upside to being an orphan.
Every bag of chips is family size.
The twin towers were like my parents... They never came back.
This is crazy! Little Johnny died!
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
An apple gets picked.
What do you call a boomerang that does not come back?
An orphan's parents.
Bro, the Twin Towers are like my grandpa and his friends. One survived—my grandpa. The others have fallen—his friends.
Why can orphans not play bingo?
Because they can't get a full house.
Why do orphans go to church? Because they can finally call someone "father."
Why do orphans hate apples?
Because they get picked over.
What is cold and alone?
An orphan's parent.
I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather.
Good thing is, since he hit his head, he can't remember either.
What’s the difference between a clock and an orphan's parents?
The clock actually comes back around.
Your hairline is as nonexistent as your dad.
I was playing hide-n-seek with my dad and he hid, but I could never find him till this day.
How do you get an orphan to go to sleep?
Tell them their parents are waiting when they wake up.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.