Aunt: On the internet, buying weight loss pills for 15 dollars.
Niece: I found that show on Netflix that you wanted to watch. It's 3 dollars to watch.
Aunt: I'm not paying for that shit.
Niece: Yet you sit there and buy weight loss pills.
What did the orphan say to his father?
Nothing, he doesn't have one.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
He thought he saw his mother.
On Xbox Live, an orphan can say "they f-ed your mom," so you can say, "at least mine didn't die from it."
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
One day, an orphan bought a boomerang. He threw it, and it didn’t come back.
How do you punch 40 kids in the face at once? Hit them with a “Sandy Hook”.
Why hasn't my dad come back? No seriously, I'm not joking.
Roses are red.
My soul is black.
I am never getting my dad back.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell them to clap til' their parents get home.
Why do orphans go to church?
So they have someone to call father.
Q: What's the hardest thing about losing your virginity?
A: Making sure she doesn't wake up.
Never tell an orphan about a family matter; they wouldn't understand.
My mama always told me, don't pick your nose or it will fall off! I thought she meant my nose.
Hey, give me a break! I'm a little shorthanded!
Oh no, not rock paper scissors again! I always lose. Come on guys, I just lost my finger a day ago! This is Tony, later on.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
I'm sorry for your loss.
It is going tibia okay.
Q: What do you call a Mexican man that lost his car?
A: Carlos.
My dad is like my virginity. I lost him at 12.
My grandpa died in 9/11. I was told his last words were "Allahu Akbar."
I've never seen my dad since September 11. I wonder where he is...
