Library

Library Jokes

why are people mad at me? all i did was the truth, and put the bible in the fiction section of the library.

This guy came into my library a year ago and borrowed a book named "How to Commit Suicide." He never returned it.

A man walks into a library and asks for books about paranoia.

The librarian whispers, "They're right behind you!"

I asked to borrow a book from the library. It was titled "Suicide in Ten Easy Steps." The cunt just stood and said, "Cheeky bastard, you won't bring it back!"

I got a job at a library once. I got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.

This isn't an orphan joke, but I got a job at a library, but it only lasted 15 minutes. Turns out, books about women’s rights shouldn’t go in the Sci-Fi / Fantasy section.

Here’s another joke my friend told me.

What did the school shooter do when the librarian told him to be quiet? Pulled out a silencer.

Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?

The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....

What do you do when you run out of lines on your book?

You look at the emo girl and say, "Hey, can I borrow your arm?"

a man went into a libary to get a book on how to commit sucide the libarian said "no you won't bring it back

We the jury are yet to deliver our final verdict, but we would like to have a guess.

Is it Mrs. Peacock with the candlestick in the library?