it's jokes
What would the Mandalorian be called if it was made in an aquatic center?
Mandachlorian.
If it is called a forehead, what happened to the five-head, six-head, and seven-head?
There's a new cooking programme on BBC1. The contestants are victims of domestic violence. It's called "Can't Cook... Right Hook."
I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...
I heard Kobe was writing a book about helicopters, but it just wouldn't land with people...
I know, I'm going to hell!
I wonder if the 2 Irish kids off the Titanic movie who went to sleep before it sank had wet dreams?
Adding a "gl" in front of "camping" doesn't make it any better.
If you add a "gl" in front of "Adolf Hitler," it doesn't make him a great guy.
How did the tree get sick?
It got tinsel-itis.
What did the little girl with no arms get for Christmas?
I don't know, she's still trying to open it...
Sheila, the Aussie housewife, got out of the shower and slipped on the bathroom floor. Instead of falling over forwards or backwards, she did the splits and suctioned cupped herself to the floor.
She yelled out for her husband, "Bruce! Bruce!" and he came running in. "Bruce, I’ve bloody suctioned myself to the floor!" she said.
"S’truth, Sheila!" Bruce said, and tried to pull her up. "You’re stuck fast girl. I’ll go across the road and get me mate Cobber."
They came back and they both tried to pull her up from the floor. "No way, we can’t do it!" Cobber said, "So let’s try Plan B."
"Plan B?" exclaimed Bruce, "What’s that?"
"I’ll go home and get me hammer and chisel and we’ll break the tiles under her," replied Cobber.
"Spot on!" Bruce said, "While you’re doing that, I’ll stay here and play with her nipples."
"Play with her nipples?" Cobber said, "Not exactly a good time for that mate!"
"No... " Bruce replied, "But I reckon if I can get her wet enough, we can slide her into the kitchen where the tiles are a lot cheaper."
That is a "Penny-Farthing" bicycle. Dimes if you feed it beans.
If a clown farted, would it smell funny?
What time is it when you get home, can you walk home and walk?
What makes it cold in a room? Air conditioning.
Why did the guy take a bath? Because he came, and it was too much of a mess.
I went to an orphanage and had a yo mama smack down. That's it.
What has it?
What time is it when your kids stay home from school? S'no time!
Q: Why are the 49ers called the 49ers?
A: 'Cause they can't make it past the 50-yard line.
I gave an orphan an iPhone X for a reason.
It doesn’t have a home button.