IT jokes
When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"
So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.
The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"
What would Earth say if it had a boyfriend?
You need to com-it.
Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?
It's always someone you know.
Yo mama so stupid, she made Patrick run away because he thought it was contagious! 🤣
Why couldn't the toilet cross the road?
Answer: 'Cause it got stuck in the crack.
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?
'Cause it was stuck in the crack... *buttcrack*
Why did my dad leave me and my mum?
I told him it wasn't big enough and then ran off saying, "Daddy, yeeeees!"
Why can't orphans eat a big bag of crisps?
'Cause it's family size...?!
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the gay man's house?
Knock knock, it's the gay man. There's a chicken at my house.
If an orphan took a photo, what would it be called?
A self-me.
This ole boy picked up this hooker and was getting some head driving down the road, and she started gagging on it a little, and he said, "Oh yeah baby, you like that big dick, don't ya?" and she said, "Oh baby, it's not that, ya asshole stinks!"
What is an orphan's first phone?
An iPhone 12. Wanna know why?
It has no home button :D
Why can't an orphan go to a family reunion?
It has no family.
I made this game called Ligma. Say it, "Ligma."
Lick my balls.
Is Google male or female?
Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a fruit joke.
Why do tryhards use Fennecs? It looks better than the Octane.
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Their dad never came with it.
I bought my son a wheelchair for his birthday—turns out he couldn’t get in it.
It's so sad that Stephen Hawking has a whole category on here about him and he can't stand up for himself.