IT jokes
Little Johnny was told by his friend that if you go to your parents and say: "I know the truth," they give you money.
So Little Johnny says to his mum, "I know the truth," so his mum hands him 20 dollars and tells him not to tell anyone. So when Little Johnny’s dad gets home, Little Johnny says, "I know the truth." His dad hands him $50 and says not to tell anyone. So Little Johnny tries it on the postman and says, "I know the truth," and the postman says, "Come here, son."
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang, because it comes back.
Bill really said "your body, my choice," like, my man, it's your body, MY choice.
It's been an hour since I crashed the tower.
Dear disabled people, just go to the settings and enable it!
Little Johnny walked into an ice cream shop and asked: "Do you have chocolate filled ice cream?"
The man replies: "We are out of that, sorry, we are almost out of every single flavor, do you want me to get you a vanilla filled one?"
Johnny replies: "Sure."
After that, the man asks for Johnny's phone and goes to back of the store. 5 minutes later, the man comes with an ice cream and Johnny's phone.
Johnny asks: "How much for the ice cream?"
The man replies: "Nothing, it's on the house."
After Johnny ate his delicious ice cream, he searched for his watch history. And then Johnny realized the flavor of the ice cream.
Yo mama is so fat that when she steps on a scale, it says "to be continued."
How many emos does it take to fix a light?
I don't know because they never came down.
If the sun had a kid, it would be like father, like sun. 🤓 😎
What did one emo say to another emo... "Rock it out!"
I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.
I needn't have bothered.
The next day, it was smeared all over my face.
I made a website about orphans.
It didn’t have a home page!
I hop on Clash Royale. I see Mega Knight. I cry.
Like if you hate the Mega Knight from Clash Royale because I really, really hate it so much!
I asked my daddy what sex was. He said, "Wanna cum and try it?"
Oh dear, I made a backwards ray. Let's test it. I made a backwards ray, let's test it oh.
Why do they call it emotion when the root word is emo, but emos don't show emotion?
When I aim this trigger, it all goes red.
Do you have a bounty 'cause you got a "M" on your head?
Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.
Look, I'm innocent. I was just going on vacation in NY, but my co-pilot said: "Hit it with your best shot."
I'm so glad I am not gay. It seems like a pain in the ass.
LOL.